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Subterranean Dow Jones Blues

(to Subterranean Homesick Blues, Bob Dylan) WilliamBanzai7 from the WSJ.com... Johnny’s in the basement Trading on the internet Out on the pavement Thinking about the government The banker in the trench coat Kicked out, laid off Says he’s got a bad cough And wants his mortgage paid off Look out kid It’s that bad trade you did God knows when But you’re doin’ it again You better duck down the alley way Lookin’ for a new scam The man in the red cap With the the big bailout pen 100 Billion dollar bills You gotta find some new thrills Big Mack’s got a big position to foot Morgan’s full of CDS soot Talkin’ that Lehman put All of us on same bus but The markets tanked anyway Mack says that many say We can go bust anyday Orders in from Ebay Look out kid Don’t matter what you did Walk on your winged tip toes Don’t try “No Doz” Better stay away from those Carry round a financial fire hose Hard to keep a clean nose Watch the men in plain clothes You don’t need a weather map To know which way your stock goes Get sick, get well Hang around a red ink well Closing bell, hard to tell If anything their goin’ to sell Try hard, get tarred Get back, go to jail Get enjoined, jump bail Join a hedge fund, if you fail Look out kid You’re gonna get hit But losers, cheaters Crooked subprime CDO dealers Hang around with 500 dollar Chelsea strippers Sitting in the toxic asset whirlpool Lookin’ for a new fool Don’t follow market leaders Watch the Federal debt meter Ah get burned, keep warm Shorts dance, lose your pants Get dressed, sell distressed Try to be a new success Please buy, don’t sell Its a steal, need a lift Twenty years of Wall Street hell And they put you on a burger shift Look out kid Try to keep it all hid Better jump through a loophole Light yourself a roman candle Don’t get caught wearing Greek sandals Try to avoid the market scandals Don’t wanna be a Wall Street bum You better chew some new gum The Fed pump don’t work Cause the vandals stole the handles